i find myself, yet again, with my mind as the container for a plethora of disjointed thoughts, seeking some kind of common thread. in an effort to find (or create) a bit of order here, i have decided that the tie that best binds the following thoughts together is the one labeled "cravings."
onward (in list format, of course).
1) rest. i have been getting a decent amount of sleep lately, but none without vivid dreams which leave me wide awake, restless, and continually pensive for the rest of the day. (some of these dreams are amusing, but the others leave me thinking that there are one or two things in my past that i haven't completely dealt with yet. note to self: this needs to be done before this summer's internship.)
2) organization. this is typical for me at the beginning of a semester, but it is especially important with my overload of classes this spring. and, mom... you will be happy to know that i just can't seem to function quite as well here unless my room is in perfect or near-perfect order.
3) ranch dressing that doesn't have the texture and (presumably) the taste of tar. seriously.
4) europe. i don't really care which country. to be in a place where the pace is slower (yet not too slow), where the buildings are older than the nation which i call home, where walking ten miles a day is normal (!!)... i love the sound of being surrounded by a foreign language, the feel of old cobblestone continually under my feet (yes, it hurts), the way the rain seems to be just a bit different than i'm used to, the smell of history mixed with national spirit, the adventure of trying to navigate a place that looks nothing at all like my hometown. don't give me a tourguide- i want to explore with no itinerary.
5) warm(ish) weather... now that the snow is beginning to melt (this week, anyway), i'm finding myself a bit anxious for warm nighttime walks and reading in the sunshine during the day.
6) time to finish (and start) the books that have been on my list for awhile now. i guess it can be beneficial to be forced to read some of them slowly, though.
7) sometimes, good conversation ...
8) ... and sometimes, complete silence and stillness.
9) another year of school (minus tuition). i'm not sure if i'm ready to grow up quite yet. i'm nervous, i'm terrified, and i'm excited all at the same time. it's a weird, and sometimes draining, mix of emotions to have. really... i have been a student for the past 16 years... i don't know anything different, except staying at home and baking cookies with mom and watching Mr. Dress-Up and using homemade crayons to color pictures.
9.5) okay, i don't actually need another year of school. i just need direction.
10) the perfect playlist. (note to self: create this whenever i have time. (note-within-note-to-self: that was a funny joke.) at least i have the first song...)
11) zephaniah 3:17.
(as an endnote, "cinnamon toast crunch" is not on this list because the DC finally decided to provide some. i'd like to think that this was for the sake of the student body's collective sanity. we are grateful.)
